Guilty Pleasure

I am an introvert. I have expressed this truth many times on the page, as well as aloud. I like being alone. I like having time dedicated to nobody or nothing but myself. It is rejuvenating and immensely relaxing. So, what do I do in my holy solitude? What makes this hermit experience so thrilling that I need to indulge? Well, there are a number of things I enjoy like reading, writing, taking a nap, watching a movie and going for long walks through the forest, but my favorite pastime is also my guilty pleasure. This of course, is nothing sexual. In fact, many of you may consider this pleasure anti-climatic and extremely lame, but I don't care. What I love to do, more than anything in the world, is to drink wine and sing along to my favorite musicals on tape.

It is true. I am a closet theater freak. Yet,  I am embarrassed by this past time. I hide my soundtracks and original cast recordings where no living soul can find them. I watch the video recordings in solitude. The only moments I burst out in song are in times when I know I am completely alone. My shame for this relatively uncool pastime among my age group has heightened to new levels. No longer do I borrow tapes from the Library for fear of what the librarians think of me when I set Sweeney Todd on the counter. At the local video rental, I ignore my desire to pull Annie Get Your Gun off the shelf and rent some romantic comedy instead.

At 22 years old, I have reverted back to my days as a pre-adolescen, questioning everything about my world. Why am I so insecure about a hobby I enjoy? Why am I ashamed of enjoying the theatrical and musical arts? Why am I so concerned about what other people may perceive as cool, or uncool? It is rather pathetic. Yet, here I am doing it anyway.

In the end, I suppose everyone has there own guilty pleasure. Everyone has something they enjoy that may be surprising or lame. And if you love something, love boldly. It is probably more refreshing than doing it in secret. And on that note, I am going to go sing Broadway's greatest hits loudly in the shower. I hope the neighbors hear.